(1) Be willing to have important conversations: Tell people what you really think, desire, see and feel — more often than not, all that stands between us and positive change is the truth. Don't expect everyone to understand where you come from. Each person has their own “truth” and reality. Many people are not ready to hear what you think or feel, but the worst thing you can do is let the little things slide. Sometimes telling the truth creates a mutual understanding that sets the table for future success. But such revelations can be daunting, especially when we feel strongly and there’s a lot at stake.
If there’s a conversation that needs to happen in your world, you have probably known it for a while. The sooner you get clear about your truth and state it in an openhearted way, the better life will get. Sometimes people will not meet you where you stand because it makes them uncomfortable. Many people believe their “reality” is how the world really works or is in-fact the only “truth” that exists. Simply stated, share as much information as possible, do so with great heart, integrity and moral authority, but be prepared to have some people let you down. Also be prepared for incredible things to begin to happen as the right person or people will show up and stand by your side.
(2) Stay open-hearted. Many times, when faced with difficult or frightening situations, we harden ourselves, close off our hearts and begin relating to people as opponents, obstacles or threats. We go into an armored, win-lose way of relating, when in many cases, the reason the situation feels so charged and scary in the first place is simply that we care! The more we are willing to present our truth in the context of our authentic hopes and desires, the better our potential and future opportunity will play out.
(3) Do some decloaking. Who are you really? Too often, we allow our shame or fear of other people’s judgment (or our fear of our own unfettered awesomeness) to stop us from answering that question honestly. The right people will love the person we all tend to hide within. Be honest. Be passionate about what you love and do not let anyone drop the bar or slow you down. All of us do better when we stretch past any current level of comfort, and some of us know certain people will never be ready to go where you need to go. Love them but don’t let anyone stop you. Trust when certain people are ready, they will rise up and you will meet again. Figure out what you want and do not settle - but also trust the first person you must speak with is YOURSELF.
Make a firm internal commitment at heart and expect the battle between you and your fragile ego to be the toughest and most honest one of all. You know I joke when I wrote this title: "Telling it Like it is" because the biggest trap in life is thinking that our way is the only way. "Like it is" is truly just "how we perceive" the world around us. No matter what, set clear standards and expectations in YOUR world and watch the world around you change... Yours in Success, Peter Dean Bouloukos Bozeman, Montana 59718 May 12, 2013